...when you are home without your kids? You blog about them. Duh.
Chuck and I drove back home today, while the boys stayed in StL with my mom for a few days. It was a lovely drive back, made all the more lovely by the quiet of the interior of the car, and the dryness of the road.
It's nice and quiet in my living room right now too, except for the sound of the Vikings game. But it does feel weird to be here without the kids. So I'll blog it out.
My kids are adorable. Have I said that? Jack was positively AMAZING on the drive down to StL. He was patient and helped Ryker and listened to what we were saying. In StL he was a had his frustrating moments, but given the extreme schedule, he did well. He showed his adoration for Kaya and Buster and and Calen and Ian (his cousins) by following them around everywhere. They showed their maturity by letting him be their shadow. Every once in awhile he would crawl into the same seat with one of them and just grin from ear to ear. This morning he laid across me and cuddled. I LOVED it. My sweet boy. He's growing up so much. He can do so many things for himself, and help us out a lot. I forget that he's only five.
Ryker also showed his sweetness on the trip. On Christmas Day we were sitting around Gaga and Papa's house opening presents. We were all in a circle with the kids in the middle, and Ryker asked my mom about opening more presents. She quietly explained to him that it was the adults' turns now, because, for instance, Momma had not opened a present and SHE had not opened a present. He listened, then got up quietly and walked out of the circle. He returned with a present from under the tree and handed it to my mom. It wasn't for her, but still. That's pretty darn cute. He got such a reaction from all of us that he went back and proceeded to bring ALL of the rest of the presents out and distribute them equally amongst the (wrong) adults.
There were many other examples of his sweetness. If several people were sitting around, he would bring them all a toy to play with. When someone mentioned they were hungry, he would give them part of his snack. When Jack said he didn't want Ryker to bring certain toys to Gaga's, Ryker would set them aside and say "my no bring dat to Gaga's, no" as he shook his head. He's such a sweet, sensitive little guy.
I love my boys. And as much as I love the silence, I do miss them!
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Driving to St. Louis
I have done the drive to St. Louis many, many times over the last 14 years. I've driven alone, with my mom, with Chuck. We've driven when I was 8 weeks pregnant, and when I was 8 months pregnant. We've driven through heat and rain and snow, in the Chevy Lumina van, the Geo Prism, the Subaru, the Honda and the Mazda - and once, Chuck drove the Honda while I drove the van and we caravanned using walkie talkies to communicate. For the longest time I would cry every time we started the drive back to Minnesota, already missing my family. (For the record, and because they are all sitting in the room as I write this very post, I still miss them terribly when I leave. I just handle it better now.)
The drive down this time was an entirely different experience, and one I hope I never have to repeat. Chuck's new job doesn't given him any vacation days, so our plan was to drive down on Christmas Eve.
We woke bright and early and tried to coax the boys to eat first and second breakfast faster. By the time we loaded the car, got everyone in and stopped for coffee, it was 9:15. By 9:45 we had turned around for home - not wanting to be one of the dozen cars we saw in the ditch. I was devastated. Chuck spent an hour clearing the driveway of the newly fallen snow, and I alternated between road condition maps of MN, IA and MO.
At 12:30 we got antsy and started off again. Southern MN was fine. Iowa was not. There were no plows out, you couldn't really see the road, and it was decently icy. Also it smelled bad. We pulled into a town looking for dinner, and got nervous when we saw that the McDonalds was closed. I have never been so happy to see an Arby's be open. We ate and went potty, put a new movie on and switched drivers.
I was ready to take my turn at the wheel, thinking that it didn't look like Chuck had much trouble. On the road back to the highway I got my first taste of really awful fishtailing. I live in MN, so that's saying something. We twisted this way and that, Chuck yelled instructions at me, we sort of tilted up on two wheels, and finally came to a dead stop in the middle of the road. I made sure I wasn't having a heart attack, and we started back on our way. The children didn't even notice - not a word. Later, I put on the rear window wiper and Ryker whipped around, going "Who dere?!???" Good thing he's observant.
I have never gripped a wheel so hard in my life. I was hunched over, trying to keep our wheels in the treads of the car in front of me when I was lucky enough to be following someone. My eyes, hands, forearms and biceps hurt. By Missouri, it was better. My boys fell asleep, all of them, and I was left to my thoughts.
It had been a very stressful day, but I found myself completely calm and happy. The car was warm and silent except for the sleepy breathing of my favorite guys. I saw houses lit up in Christmas lights and knew that lots of people were with loved ones, smiling and laughing and recharging. And I knew that we'd soon be joining their ranks. I must love my family a lot, because I did not CARE how long it took us to get there, or how awful the journey was, I just wanted to be there with them.
We pulled into my mom's garage exactly 12 hours after we left (the second time). Within five minutes the kids were opening presents, commencing the spoiling for the week. I feel spoiled too - great family, non-stop eating, people playing with my kids, and a little blogging time to boot. Life is good.
The drive down this time was an entirely different experience, and one I hope I never have to repeat. Chuck's new job doesn't given him any vacation days, so our plan was to drive down on Christmas Eve.
We woke bright and early and tried to coax the boys to eat first and second breakfast faster. By the time we loaded the car, got everyone in and stopped for coffee, it was 9:15. By 9:45 we had turned around for home - not wanting to be one of the dozen cars we saw in the ditch. I was devastated. Chuck spent an hour clearing the driveway of the newly fallen snow, and I alternated between road condition maps of MN, IA and MO.
At 12:30 we got antsy and started off again. Southern MN was fine. Iowa was not. There were no plows out, you couldn't really see the road, and it was decently icy. Also it smelled bad. We pulled into a town looking for dinner, and got nervous when we saw that the McDonalds was closed. I have never been so happy to see an Arby's be open. We ate and went potty, put a new movie on and switched drivers.
I was ready to take my turn at the wheel, thinking that it didn't look like Chuck had much trouble. On the road back to the highway I got my first taste of really awful fishtailing. I live in MN, so that's saying something. We twisted this way and that, Chuck yelled instructions at me, we sort of tilted up on two wheels, and finally came to a dead stop in the middle of the road. I made sure I wasn't having a heart attack, and we started back on our way. The children didn't even notice - not a word. Later, I put on the rear window wiper and Ryker whipped around, going "Who dere?!???" Good thing he's observant.
I have never gripped a wheel so hard in my life. I was hunched over, trying to keep our wheels in the treads of the car in front of me when I was lucky enough to be following someone. My eyes, hands, forearms and biceps hurt. By Missouri, it was better. My boys fell asleep, all of them, and I was left to my thoughts.
It had been a very stressful day, but I found myself completely calm and happy. The car was warm and silent except for the sleepy breathing of my favorite guys. I saw houses lit up in Christmas lights and knew that lots of people were with loved ones, smiling and laughing and recharging. And I knew that we'd soon be joining their ranks. I must love my family a lot, because I did not CARE how long it took us to get there, or how awful the journey was, I just wanted to be there with them.
We pulled into my mom's garage exactly 12 hours after we left (the second time). Within five minutes the kids were opening presents, commencing the spoiling for the week. I feel spoiled too - great family, non-stop eating, people playing with my kids, and a little blogging time to boot. Life is good.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
I love my kids
This post will serve a dual purpose. First, I will get to express my undying love for my offspring. And second, I will have something to look back on and read while driving to StL, as they will no doubt be screaming and yelling and hitting in the back seat. It will be a sort of safety net so I don't yell back. Like my own little Blog Happy Place & Mute Button.
My kids are at really cute ages right now. Jack is REALLY smart (proud momma) and can figure out all sorts of things, including when adults are speaking in code. He knows all of the dirt at his school because he listens to every word the teachers say. I was that way. He can have really good conversations about things with us. But mostly what I love about him right now is his love for Ryker. He truly adores that kid. And it's not like Ryk is a baby who isn't in his way - Ryker is actually pretty annoying to him. He follows him around and takes his things. Nonetheless, Jack will put everything aside to help Ryk. This morning Jack refused to get dressed, opting instead to stand with only underwear on so he could stay with Ryker in the bathroom as he tried to go potty. I asked Jack what he was doing and he said that Ryker might get scared if he left him, so he wanted to stay in there with him. Sweet boy. And on our way home from some outings tonight, Ryker undid his own seat belt. None of us could reach it and we were on the highway so I couldn't pull over. We were really close to our destination, so we just let it go. You should have HEARD Jack. He was so nervous the whole time. Kept asking us to fix it, and when we pulled into the parking lot at Burger King, instead of exclaiming his joy at the impending Play Place experience, he yelled that it was so good we were there because now we could buckle Ryker in!
Ryker himself is pretty darn cute. He is TALKATIVE. And expressive. We were out with some friends tonight at a not-so-kid-friendly bar. After awhile he came toward us through a crowd of people and had put his own coat on upside down and inside out. Subtle. In our haste to get everyone into the car and buckled up, I lost our keys. We knew they were there somewhere, but couldn't find them. We finally took Ryk out of his seat and found them under him. As we drove off, he goes "Cwazy Wykur, me has keys!" and just cracked up laughing. (For the record, none of us called him crazy.)
They both did an awesome job at the holiday program at their school. Jack got to be the flag bearer, which was thrilling for him. He sang and danced to all the songs. He looked so handsome and proud. And Ryker stole the toddler's portion of the show. He was hilarious. The kids were all lined up on the stage, and they all stood still and stared straight ahead, like a very long police line-up. All except Ryker, who stood in the middle of the crew and DANCED. He danced and danced his little heart out. My face hurt from smiling so hard at him. He was having such a good time! Pictures (although really bad) are on Flickr to the right.
My kids are at really cute ages right now. Jack is REALLY smart (proud momma) and can figure out all sorts of things, including when adults are speaking in code. He knows all of the dirt at his school because he listens to every word the teachers say. I was that way. He can have really good conversations about things with us. But mostly what I love about him right now is his love for Ryker. He truly adores that kid. And it's not like Ryk is a baby who isn't in his way - Ryker is actually pretty annoying to him. He follows him around and takes his things. Nonetheless, Jack will put everything aside to help Ryk. This morning Jack refused to get dressed, opting instead to stand with only underwear on so he could stay with Ryker in the bathroom as he tried to go potty. I asked Jack what he was doing and he said that Ryker might get scared if he left him, so he wanted to stay in there with him. Sweet boy. And on our way home from some outings tonight, Ryker undid his own seat belt. None of us could reach it and we were on the highway so I couldn't pull over. We were really close to our destination, so we just let it go. You should have HEARD Jack. He was so nervous the whole time. Kept asking us to fix it, and when we pulled into the parking lot at Burger King, instead of exclaiming his joy at the impending Play Place experience, he yelled that it was so good we were there because now we could buckle Ryker in!
Ryker himself is pretty darn cute. He is TALKATIVE. And expressive. We were out with some friends tonight at a not-so-kid-friendly bar. After awhile he came toward us through a crowd of people and had put his own coat on upside down and inside out. Subtle. In our haste to get everyone into the car and buckled up, I lost our keys. We knew they were there somewhere, but couldn't find them. We finally took Ryk out of his seat and found them under him. As we drove off, he goes "Cwazy Wykur, me has keys!" and just cracked up laughing. (For the record, none of us called him crazy.)
They both did an awesome job at the holiday program at their school. Jack got to be the flag bearer, which was thrilling for him. He sang and danced to all the songs. He looked so handsome and proud. And Ryker stole the toddler's portion of the show. He was hilarious. The kids were all lined up on the stage, and they all stood still and stared straight ahead, like a very long police line-up. All except Ryker, who stood in the middle of the crew and DANCED. He danced and danced his little heart out. My face hurt from smiling so hard at him. He was having such a good time! Pictures (although really bad) are on Flickr to the right.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Venting
I need to vent.
It's hard to be a good mom to two young, willful boys.
It's hard to be a good wife all the time through a stressful year.
It's hard to try to get back into shape and make time for the gym.
It's hard to work a full-time job that frequently requires (unpaid) overtime.
It's hard to volunteer my time, and not even do as much as I want to do.
It's hard to keep the house clean, the kids clean, and me clean.
It's hard to make time to see friends as often as I'd like.
It's hard to work on my anxiety issues every single day.
Whew. Decent list. I wish I was doing a better job at every last one of those items. I get frustrated when I feel like I'm doing those things only moderately well.
But what is harder than each the things above is knowing that others are doing them all by themselves, with no support network. And so I vent and then I get over it and stop feeing sorry for myself, and then I thank all of you for being such good friends and family (or total strangers, maybe, but whatever - I thank you too).
It's hard to be a good mom to two young, willful boys.
It's hard to be a good wife all the time through a stressful year.
It's hard to try to get back into shape and make time for the gym.
It's hard to work a full-time job that frequently requires (unpaid) overtime.
It's hard to volunteer my time, and not even do as much as I want to do.
It's hard to keep the house clean, the kids clean, and me clean.
It's hard to make time to see friends as often as I'd like.
It's hard to work on my anxiety issues every single day.
Whew. Decent list. I wish I was doing a better job at every last one of those items. I get frustrated when I feel like I'm doing those things only moderately well.
But what is harder than each the things above is knowing that others are doing them all by themselves, with no support network. And so I vent and then I get over it and stop feeing sorry for myself, and then I thank all of you for being such good friends and family (or total strangers, maybe, but whatever - I thank you too).
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Things We're Happy About
We just got through the most ridiculous weekend we've had in a long time. Tantrums, biting, whining, diminishing beer supply, broken internet connection. Oh, and 17.1" of snow - the 5th most in MN history - and blizzard conditions.
The bulk of the snow fell on Saturday. Minnesotans were advised not to go ANYWHERE under ANY CIRCUMSTANCE. So we were stuck in our house. It was really cold and windy too, so we didn't even go to our driveway. People all over Facebook and Twitter were announcing their wonderment at this scene, and their delight in getting to curl up and read books all day. Those people clearly don't have two young boys.
While Chuck attempted to dig us out of our driveway, I attempted to keep the children from killing each other, or me. I wanted to get casseroles in the oven for dinner, so I put on some Christmas music and set to work. Both kids sat up at the counter, Ryker demanding second lunch. They were both crabby, as was I. Ryker learned a new phrase, which he proudly exclaims all day long now - "Knock it off!"
To regain sanity, I decided we'd play a rousing game of "What Makes You Happy." We went around and took turns giving our answers.
Mom: "Ryker, what are YOU happy about?"
Ryker: "Mercris" (Merry Christmas)
Mom: "That's good. Jack?"
Jack: "I'm happy that we have a roof and a house in snow storms. And thunder storms."
M: "Me too. I'm happy that we have lots of good food to eat. Ryker?"
R: "Teets" (treats)
J: "I'm happy because I love Mom more than anything else in the world. And that makes me happy."
M: (wiping big happy tears away and waiting for him to ask me for something, like a new car or $100) "That is THE NICEST thing I have heard in a long time. I love you too. And THAT makes me happy."
J: "I'm also happy for tartar sauce."
Three hours later, my Ready-In-30-Minutes recipe was in the oven and we didn't kill each other after all. Merry Christmas.
The bulk of the snow fell on Saturday. Minnesotans were advised not to go ANYWHERE under ANY CIRCUMSTANCE. So we were stuck in our house. It was really cold and windy too, so we didn't even go to our driveway. People all over Facebook and Twitter were announcing their wonderment at this scene, and their delight in getting to curl up and read books all day. Those people clearly don't have two young boys.
While Chuck attempted to dig us out of our driveway, I attempted to keep the children from killing each other, or me. I wanted to get casseroles in the oven for dinner, so I put on some Christmas music and set to work. Both kids sat up at the counter, Ryker demanding second lunch. They were both crabby, as was I. Ryker learned a new phrase, which he proudly exclaims all day long now - "Knock it off!"
To regain sanity, I decided we'd play a rousing game of "What Makes You Happy." We went around and took turns giving our answers.
Mom: "Ryker, what are YOU happy about?"
Ryker: "Mercris" (Merry Christmas)
Mom: "That's good. Jack?"
Jack: "I'm happy that we have a roof and a house in snow storms. And thunder storms."
M: "Me too. I'm happy that we have lots of good food to eat. Ryker?"
R: "Teets" (treats)
J: "I'm happy because I love Mom more than anything else in the world. And that makes me happy."
M: (wiping big happy tears away and waiting for him to ask me for something, like a new car or $100) "That is THE NICEST thing I have heard in a long time. I love you too. And THAT makes me happy."
J: "I'm also happy for tartar sauce."
Three hours later, my Ready-In-30-Minutes recipe was in the oven and we didn't kill each other after all. Merry Christmas.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Jack Jokes
Jack has really taken to joke-telling. His sense of humor is really, really odd sometimes. (Forgive me if I've noted some of these before - I'm too lazy to go check on previous posts.)
His old standby was as follows:
Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
A: Because he was feeling kinda crumby.
Then he moved on to the following, coming out of one of his books:
One old dinosaur: "I'm old and sore."
Other dinosaur: "I've never heard of an oldensaur."
He was so enamored with that one that he named his stuffed gorilla "oldensaur."
The same book produced his favorite line:
"You're too smalls to be my meatballs."
Then a joke out of another book:
Q: Where does the king keep his armies?
A: In his sleevies.
This one had me a little worried. I read that part to him and he laughed so hard that no sound was coming out, his face turned red and his one dimple - high, high up on his right cheek - totally sunk into his face. Once he regained the ability to talk, he made me practice the joke with him so he could tell it to his friends at school.
Then last night he busted out a new one:
Q: How many "pwirrels" (squirrels) does it take to change a lightbulb?
I was THRILLED that we were moving into new genres of joke telling, and eagerly awaited his response.
A: 98
That was it. He sat laughing and laughing and laughing and I sat bewildered, wondering if my 5 year old was telling me a joke that was above my humor-intelligence-quotient.
His old standby was as follows:
Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
A: Because he was feeling kinda crumby.
Then he moved on to the following, coming out of one of his books:
One old dinosaur: "I'm old and sore."
Other dinosaur: "I've never heard of an oldensaur."
He was so enamored with that one that he named his stuffed gorilla "oldensaur."
The same book produced his favorite line:
"You're too smalls to be my meatballs."
Then a joke out of another book:
Q: Where does the king keep his armies?
A: In his sleevies.
This one had me a little worried. I read that part to him and he laughed so hard that no sound was coming out, his face turned red and his one dimple - high, high up on his right cheek - totally sunk into his face. Once he regained the ability to talk, he made me practice the joke with him so he could tell it to his friends at school.
Then last night he busted out a new one:
Q: How many "pwirrels" (squirrels) does it take to change a lightbulb?
I was THRILLED that we were moving into new genres of joke telling, and eagerly awaited his response.
A: 98
That was it. He sat laughing and laughing and laughing and I sat bewildered, wondering if my 5 year old was telling me a joke that was above my humor-intelligence-quotient.
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