Every year for the last decade has seen major happenings:
1999 - Chuck graduated from Carleton
2000 - Chuck and I got engaged
2001 - I graduated from Carleton
2002 - We bought our first house and got married
2003 - Ummm....okay I can't remember a major event here
2004 - We embarked on our first (and last) adventure with a Great Dane puppy
2005 - Jack was born and Chuck forever ruined his knee
2006 - Chuck and I both changed jobs
2007 - We moved to our current house
2008 - Ryker was born
With that line-up said, 2009 seems pretty calm. The biggest thing for me has been finding help and beginning my recovering from panic disorder. Six months in and I'm making good strides. I have a long way to go, but am so grateful for having found the therapist I found. I expect that 2010 will be filled with milestones and achievements in this area for me.
I completed a full year in my new role at work, and Chuck found a new job. We all settled into our roles - Jack as big brother and somewhat self-sufficient boy; Chuck and me as parents of two very active boys; Ryker as the entertainment factor. We had to switch daycares, which was sad, but we feel lucky to have found the place we did and the boys seem to be thriving.
The year wasn't without its share of sadness. Chuck's side of the family lost two very special people, both before their time. Both passed within a month of each other, and the family grieved together. We miss Cameron and Wendy terribly.
On a lighter note, new loves were discovered. Jack began a love-affair with combing his hair and spelling, although not at the same time. He loved riding his bike, shoveling snow, and helping cook. Ryker fell in love with following Jackson around, playing with blocks, saying "NO!", socks and shoes, and bananas. Chuck and I became obsessed with the TV show Lost and with sitting around watching our boys be crazy. We also fell in love with our new neighbors.
So thanks to everyone for their love, friendship and support in 2009, and we're looking forward to a great 2010.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Update
Here's the update...
We went through with it. The note from Santa was very nice - saying he knows how much Jack wants the vacuum and he has it ready for him, but that he knows that Jack has been having some trouble with behavior. He said he needs Jack to earn this special present, and he gave him a sticker chart. It only has seven spaces on it, so this shouldn't take long.
Jack did not cry, and neither did I while reading the note to him. It did get his attention though.
So we'll see what happens. I'm feeling like we made a good choice, although I know there will be naysayers out there. Chuck and I think we did the right thing, took advantage of an opportunity to get his attention and let him know that he doesn't get everything he wants WHEN he wants it. And definitely not without behaving.
We went through with it. The note from Santa was very nice - saying he knows how much Jack wants the vacuum and he has it ready for him, but that he knows that Jack has been having some trouble with behavior. He said he needs Jack to earn this special present, and he gave him a sticker chart. It only has seven spaces on it, so this shouldn't take long.
Jack did not cry, and neither did I while reading the note to him. It did get his attention though.
So we'll see what happens. I'm feeling like we made a good choice, although I know there will be naysayers out there. Chuck and I think we did the right thing, took advantage of an opportunity to get his attention and let him know that he doesn't get everything he wants WHEN he wants it. And definitely not without behaving.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Twas the Night Before Christmas
Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even the worst Mommy in the world.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that St. Nicklaus soon would be there.
And yes, he will be there, only he won't be bringing the vacuum Jack has been asking for the last few months. Why, you ask? Why wouldn't St. Nick be bringing the ONLY thing Jack has asked for? Because Jack has parents that are heartless. We are stubborn. And we are not willing to have our child be selfish and ungrateful, which is exactly how he's been acting the last few weeks. Lots of "you're a bad girl!" shouted at me...lots of hitting and kicking and talking back...and the kicker - I said I wasn't sure what would happen with his presents if he didn't behave and he said, knowingly, "oh, I'll GET presents...." That was the straw that broke our heartless backs. Because he's right. Of course he'll get presents. And withholding any of them wouldn't mean a thing unless we withhold THE present.
So our plan is this...we're going to write him a note from Santa saying that he knows he wants the vacuum and he can get it soon, but Santa isn't pleased with his behavior recently, so Jack will have to earn it.
I was feeling more bad-ass than anything - like we're doing the right thing and teaching him a hard lesson but that it will be worth it. But all day he's been going around telling people that he's getting only one present and that it's going to be a vacuum. And he's so thrilled about that. He said it again before bed. So I left him reading books with Chuck and I came out here and hopped on the internet to find out what stores are open this late on Christmas Eve because I don't know if I can handle the thought of disappointing him like this.
Stay tuned.
Not a creature was stirring, not even the worst Mommy in the world.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that St. Nicklaus soon would be there.
And yes, he will be there, only he won't be bringing the vacuum Jack has been asking for the last few months. Why, you ask? Why wouldn't St. Nick be bringing the ONLY thing Jack has asked for? Because Jack has parents that are heartless. We are stubborn. And we are not willing to have our child be selfish and ungrateful, which is exactly how he's been acting the last few weeks. Lots of "you're a bad girl!" shouted at me...lots of hitting and kicking and talking back...and the kicker - I said I wasn't sure what would happen with his presents if he didn't behave and he said, knowingly, "oh, I'll GET presents...." That was the straw that broke our heartless backs. Because he's right. Of course he'll get presents. And withholding any of them wouldn't mean a thing unless we withhold THE present.
So our plan is this...we're going to write him a note from Santa saying that he knows he wants the vacuum and he can get it soon, but Santa isn't pleased with his behavior recently, so Jack will have to earn it.
I was feeling more bad-ass than anything - like we're doing the right thing and teaching him a hard lesson but that it will be worth it. But all day he's been going around telling people that he's getting only one present and that it's going to be a vacuum. And he's so thrilled about that. He said it again before bed. So I left him reading books with Chuck and I came out here and hopped on the internet to find out what stores are open this late on Christmas Eve because I don't know if I can handle the thought of disappointing him like this.
Stay tuned.
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Nights You Wish You Were At Work
I had a decently stressful week at work. Lots of plates to keep spinning, new processes to figure out, policies to write, etc. etc. etc. Each night when I went home I was excited to hang out with the boys before putting them in bed and getting back to work. Woe is me, right?
On Friday I ended up looking back at my week fondly and wishing I could just go back to the office instead of dealing with my children. That's when it's bad.
Here's how it went down...
I arrived at daycare around 5:30. Jack was wandering around his room whimpering. His teacher said that he was fine until he got pinched in the gym, and she thought he was being sensitive about it. He wouldn't speak - just collapsed in a puddle in my arms. That made Ryker sob, as did the fact that he kept tripping on the blanket he was walking around with. And I wouldn't let him throw that into the snow. Bad mom.
I loaded them into the car and finally got Jack to tell me that his ear hurt. He screamed the entire way home, as did Ryker, and then MY ear was hurting. But I didn't scream. Not yet. I tried to drown them out with MPR.
By the time I pulled into the garage I had already diagnosed Jack with an ear infection and formulated a plan. I would wait for Chuck to get home from the store and he'd watch Ryk while I took Jack to the Minute Clinic at Target. The flaw with my plan? Chuck was still IN the store WITHOUT his phone. And somehow calling, texting, muttering, swearing and calling back was not changing the situation.
I got the kids into the house - both still puddles. Only Jack was able to identify his pain, so he got my attention. Ryker got thrown into his highchair with a pile of Puffs in front of him. He didn't stop screaming. I held Jack on the couch while he sobbed and shuddered and wailed and made horrific little choking sounds. Still swearing, I bundled the kids up again (remember that it's about 5 degrees in MN this time of year) and loaded them into the car. Ryker punched me repeatedly in the arm as I latched him in.
We arrived at Target and I got the boys into the clinic. Ryker laid on the ground in the waiting area, screaming and rolling around and hitting anyone that came near him. Jack sat on a chair and sobbed, yelling "MOMMMMMMAAAAAAA-AA-AAA-AAA!" repeatedly. I tried to make jokes to the passers-by - all of them - because they were ALL staring and wondering why I wasn't at the ER because obviously both children had just had limbs forcibly removed, right? The little girl sitting in the waiting room looked panicked as she watched my boys destroy the nice little lobby - throwing Kleenex around - dragging books all over and drooling/crying on them - pulling trash out of the trashcan.
Finally Chuck arrived. Amazing how much better that made ME feel. Screw the kids. I took Ryker home and Chuck stayed with Jack, who did, in fact, have an ear infection.
But alas, we're not out of the woods. Apparently "E-Prescriptions" can take up to 45 minutes to get to Walgreens. I could have run backwards to Walgreens and mixed the prescription myself faster than that.
So Jack went to sleep and Chuck went to get the meds. He came back and we went into his room to give them to him. "Wake up, Bud....Bud?...Come on...Get UP!" Took us a good 15-20 minutes to get him to sit up, and then he was sobbing and fighting us off so I had to hold him up while Chuck shoved meds into his mouth.
He awoke at 5am wanting to play and eat and go swimming. And he had NO recollection of the nurse-session the night before.
On Friday I ended up looking back at my week fondly and wishing I could just go back to the office instead of dealing with my children. That's when it's bad.
Here's how it went down...
I arrived at daycare around 5:30. Jack was wandering around his room whimpering. His teacher said that he was fine until he got pinched in the gym, and she thought he was being sensitive about it. He wouldn't speak - just collapsed in a puddle in my arms. That made Ryker sob, as did the fact that he kept tripping on the blanket he was walking around with. And I wouldn't let him throw that into the snow. Bad mom.
I loaded them into the car and finally got Jack to tell me that his ear hurt. He screamed the entire way home, as did Ryker, and then MY ear was hurting. But I didn't scream. Not yet. I tried to drown them out with MPR.
By the time I pulled into the garage I had already diagnosed Jack with an ear infection and formulated a plan. I would wait for Chuck to get home from the store and he'd watch Ryk while I took Jack to the Minute Clinic at Target. The flaw with my plan? Chuck was still IN the store WITHOUT his phone. And somehow calling, texting, muttering, swearing and calling back was not changing the situation.
I got the kids into the house - both still puddles. Only Jack was able to identify his pain, so he got my attention. Ryker got thrown into his highchair with a pile of Puffs in front of him. He didn't stop screaming. I held Jack on the couch while he sobbed and shuddered and wailed and made horrific little choking sounds. Still swearing, I bundled the kids up again (remember that it's about 5 degrees in MN this time of year) and loaded them into the car. Ryker punched me repeatedly in the arm as I latched him in.
We arrived at Target and I got the boys into the clinic. Ryker laid on the ground in the waiting area, screaming and rolling around and hitting anyone that came near him. Jack sat on a chair and sobbed, yelling "MOMMMMMMAAAAAAA-AA-AAA-AAA!" repeatedly. I tried to make jokes to the passers-by - all of them - because they were ALL staring and wondering why I wasn't at the ER because obviously both children had just had limbs forcibly removed, right? The little girl sitting in the waiting room looked panicked as she watched my boys destroy the nice little lobby - throwing Kleenex around - dragging books all over and drooling/crying on them - pulling trash out of the trashcan.
Finally Chuck arrived. Amazing how much better that made ME feel. Screw the kids. I took Ryker home and Chuck stayed with Jack, who did, in fact, have an ear infection.
But alas, we're not out of the woods. Apparently "E-Prescriptions" can take up to 45 minutes to get to Walgreens. I could have run backwards to Walgreens and mixed the prescription myself faster than that.
So Jack went to sleep and Chuck went to get the meds. He came back and we went into his room to give them to him. "Wake up, Bud....Bud?...Come on...Get UP!" Took us a good 15-20 minutes to get him to sit up, and then he was sobbing and fighting us off so I had to hold him up while Chuck shoved meds into his mouth.
He awoke at 5am wanting to play and eat and go swimming. And he had NO recollection of the nurse-session the night before.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
More About the Songs
I have finally deciphered the lyrics to the Christopher Columbus song (see previous post). It took my 75 year old mother-in-law to figure it out.
Christopher Columbus
Sailed to America
On the Santa Mar-i-a
In 1492
Christopher Columbus
Sailed with the flag of Spain (or something like that)
For King Ferdinand
.....blah blah blah
Jack has been singing this non-stop, including during time-outs, since last week. He also has been singing The National Anthem, which he thinks MUST be preceded by the Pledge of Allegiance. His lyrics are not quite what they are supposed to be. Something about the "lice gleaming." And if he messes up (I'm not sure how he quantifies this, seeing as how he's not saying the correct words anyway), he starts all over with the Pledge.
I think we'll have to teach him how to cover his tracks better if he wants to have a music career, or a reality-show-music-career. It's a dead give-away when you mess up a word and then start all over (with a different thing entirely), although I do admire his persistence.
Christopher Columbus
Sailed to America
On the Santa Mar-i-a
In 1492
Christopher Columbus
Sailed with the flag of Spain (or something like that)
For King Ferdinand
.....blah blah blah
Jack has been singing this non-stop, including during time-outs, since last week. He also has been singing The National Anthem, which he thinks MUST be preceded by the Pledge of Allegiance. His lyrics are not quite what they are supposed to be. Something about the "lice gleaming." And if he messes up (I'm not sure how he quantifies this, seeing as how he's not saying the correct words anyway), he starts all over with the Pledge.
I think we'll have to teach him how to cover his tracks better if he wants to have a music career, or a reality-show-music-career. It's a dead give-away when you mess up a word and then start all over (with a different thing entirely), although I do admire his persistence.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Performing
We've had a myriad of illnesses in our household this week, and as a result I totally forgot the Holiday Performance at the kids' school. It was Tuesday morning and I was dropping Jackson off alone because Sick Daddy was taking Sick Ryker to the doctor. I walked in, feeling guilty about the Sick Ones, and was asked immediately by one of the teachers "well, aren't you coming back for the performance?" Hello again Guilt. And then "well, he DOES have a solo." More Guilt.
I got in the van and began driving, not sure if I was going to work or not. Guilt. But family comes first, so I went home and did some work until it was time for the performance.
The parents, lots of them, gathered in a large room waiting for the kids. Finally they began walking in, single file. One girl began crying as she glimpsed the large crowd. Their teacher asked Jack to take her in, so he led her in, holding her hand. It was adorable.
The kids sang a bunch of songs and did little hand motions with them. Little kids singing is just about the cutest thing. I was grinning ear to ear, alternately thinking about how much my cheeks hurt and wondering how the woman in front of me had not even been able to manage a smirk.
Then it happened - Jackson stepped forward all by himself. What a big boy he was. His bravery took me by surprise. He sang a line, the group repeated it, and so on until the song finished. He looked right at me as he sang, and held his hands together in front of him. When he was finished he grinned sheepishly and stepped back into line.
Later the big kids sat in the front row on the ground while the toddlers marched in. Chuck had arrived only minutes before with Ryker, who had been cleared to return to school and was promptly lined up with the others and ordered to dance. They marched into the room, stood in one line and danced, rang bells and clapped to about five songs. Ryk did great - didn't move from his spot except for the one time I made the mistake of waving to him and he took off running for me.
Then Santa came, all the kids got presents, and we all headed off for our various jobs. I told my coworkers about how great Jackson was and the first question they asked me was "what did he sing?" I had no idea - I was smiling so big that I couldn't really hear him. Sort of like my wedding - I remember really being happy, but could not tell you what was said. So I made Jack sing it for me that night (and he, in turn, made me play the part of the chorus and repeat his lines after him):
Christopher Columbus (Christopher Columbus) - Came to America (repeat) - On the Santa Mar-i-a (repeat) - in 1492 (repeat)...there was more but he was annoyed that I couldn't understand him so we just did those lines over and over again. The song is forever etched in my brain.
(Pictures are on Flickr, and next year I promise to bring something other than my iPhone so I can get better photos.)
I got in the van and began driving, not sure if I was going to work or not. Guilt. But family comes first, so I went home and did some work until it was time for the performance.
The parents, lots of them, gathered in a large room waiting for the kids. Finally they began walking in, single file. One girl began crying as she glimpsed the large crowd. Their teacher asked Jack to take her in, so he led her in, holding her hand. It was adorable.
The kids sang a bunch of songs and did little hand motions with them. Little kids singing is just about the cutest thing. I was grinning ear to ear, alternately thinking about how much my cheeks hurt and wondering how the woman in front of me had not even been able to manage a smirk.
Then it happened - Jackson stepped forward all by himself. What a big boy he was. His bravery took me by surprise. He sang a line, the group repeated it, and so on until the song finished. He looked right at me as he sang, and held his hands together in front of him. When he was finished he grinned sheepishly and stepped back into line.
Later the big kids sat in the front row on the ground while the toddlers marched in. Chuck had arrived only minutes before with Ryker, who had been cleared to return to school and was promptly lined up with the others and ordered to dance. They marched into the room, stood in one line and danced, rang bells and clapped to about five songs. Ryk did great - didn't move from his spot except for the one time I made the mistake of waving to him and he took off running for me.
Then Santa came, all the kids got presents, and we all headed off for our various jobs. I told my coworkers about how great Jackson was and the first question they asked me was "what did he sing?" I had no idea - I was smiling so big that I couldn't really hear him. Sort of like my wedding - I remember really being happy, but could not tell you what was said. So I made Jack sing it for me that night (and he, in turn, made me play the part of the chorus and repeat his lines after him):
Christopher Columbus (Christopher Columbus) - Came to America (repeat) - On the Santa Mar-i-a (repeat) - in 1492 (repeat)...there was more but he was annoyed that I couldn't understand him so we just did those lines over and over again. The song is forever etched in my brain.
(Pictures are on Flickr, and next year I promise to bring something other than my iPhone so I can get better photos.)
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
The Invisible Boat
Jack, like most kids, is keenly aware of his surroundings. We are constantly impressed at the things he notices, the conversations he hears and can repeat. We have found a chink in his observant-armor, however.
Tugboat.
Apparently Jack does not notice her at all. She had been down at Grandma Bernice's during our trip and we had yet to go get her. During dinner last night Jack suddenly blurted out "Where's Tug?" We had been home a full two days at this point.
When the kids were in bed, Chuck drove down to Northfield to get her and brought her back, so she was there this morning.
Jack had been out in the living room, with Tug, for about half an hour this morning when he finally turned and saw her and goes "TUGGY!!!!" I said "Jack, did you just now notice that she's back?" and he said "well, someone was licking my feet while I was eating and I was like 'Who's that licking my feet?!'"
Tugboat.
Apparently Jack does not notice her at all. She had been down at Grandma Bernice's during our trip and we had yet to go get her. During dinner last night Jack suddenly blurted out "Where's Tug?" We had been home a full two days at this point.
When the kids were in bed, Chuck drove down to Northfield to get her and brought her back, so she was there this morning.
Jack had been out in the living room, with Tug, for about half an hour this morning when he finally turned and saw her and goes "TUGGY!!!!" I said "Jack, did you just now notice that she's back?" and he said "well, someone was licking my feet while I was eating and I was like 'Who's that licking my feet?!'"
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Thanksgiving Lessons
Holidays, time with family, and 20 hours in the car give you lots to think about. There were many lessons learned this Thanksgiving. I'll list a few, and you'll have to check Flickr later for pictures (technical difficulties).
- Jack is incapable of "making it" longer than 20 minutes without food.
- Ryker is incapable of sitting quietly.
- Even with dietary restrictions, Kaya and Christi can tag-team to eat pizza - Christi eats the crust and Kaya eats the cheese.
- It will take you 3 minutes to enter the zoo for every 1 person you attempt to go with - that means 33 minutes for us to get in the door. I'm not kidding.
- Related to that - the sliding doors at the St. Louis Zoo slide and ALSO open on a hinge, so double strollers really DO fit.
- Ryker and Jack really, really like hugging and holding hands with Beth.
- Josh is Jackson's hero.
- Ryker thinks it's hysterical when you pretend his socks smell funny.
- Jackson really likes taking care of Ryker, and will "make him fine." This holds true except when Ryker needs consoling in the middle of the night - at that point Jack will be so passed out he won't hear him crying 1 foot away.
- Chip and Christi aren't worried about their kids getting too close to the Wildlife Refuge that is down the road, mostly because the kids would have to get through the "Crazy Farmer" first.
- When it was time to say goodbye, Ryker thought everyone deserved a hug, but that Josh would appreciate a simple wave goodbye instead.
- I never laugh harder than when I'm in a room with my family, especially Christi and Beth -- and StL, my mom's house, and Charlie and BJ's always feel like home.
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