Confidence

I love Jack's comfort and confidence. I know it will likely diminish as he starts being more aware of his peers and their judgement of him. The desire to avoid ridicule and embarrassment will create inhibitions. I can see it starting already.

But for now he will run straight into his classroom and start telling elephant jokes. He'll freely walk up to kids he doesn't know and ask them to play with him. He tries new things and is eager to learn.

This really struck me tonight. When I arrived home Jack and Ryker announced that tonight we would be having a dance party. Jack was preparing some ropes, although I still have no idea what purpose they served. Ryker had a damp washcloth and was cleaning the surfaces of Jack's room in preparation. Finally it was time - Jack turned off the light and turned on the music. We've had a number of these parties already, and I know my place. He doesn't want ME to actually dance. He prefers I sit on his bed and watch HIM dance. This time I added some value by putting on a light show with his flashlight. I can't tell you how great it is to watch him in these parties. He literally closes his eyes and just moves to the music. It's fantastic. He looks totally peaceful. I LOVE it. I want him to always feel that freedom.

Ryker, for his part, has a healthy ego and self-confidence as well. I went into his room to say goodnight tonight, post-dance party and post-bedtime stories with Dad. I patted his head and rubbed his back. I told him I loved him. Then Tugboat came in. Ryker said "Tuhboh come in here. Tuhboh yuv me. Evybody yuv me." True.